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Many societies have practised inter-family/community adoption for centuries, but find that today's laws do not reflect or respect their traditional, considered and sophisticated, customs. A significant Australian example is the Torres Strait Islander people, who have customary adoption practices that are quite different from Western concepts of adoption. As a result of intractable medical problems, my sister, Maggie, had had a hysterectomy at the age of 30. I knew she would love a baby. I had two children; our other sister, Cynthia, had three; and my kids were asking for another sibling. Jim, my husband, and I were not prepared to expand our family any more. But helping to provide a cousin seemed reasonable.

At first I imagined that the process would involve using my brother-in-law's sperm and my egg. I couldn't imagine giving up a child that was genetically mine, and I surprised everyone when I announced at a dinner …